I Will Be (A Poem)

I just wrote my last final today, so my Christmas holidays have truly started. I don’t have a lot of time today because I’m watching some Christmas movies with my parents. Maybe Home Alone, White Christmas, Miracle On 34th Street or other great Christmas films.

I dug up an old poem I wrote many years ago, before I was the over-confident nutcase I am today. For a short period in my life I had some feelings of embarrassment about different things I liked or did (like being a nerd) and stuff like that. It really didn’t last long, maybe my first year of high school.

I wrote this poem right around the time that I adopted a new “I don’t give a crap what anyone thinks” attitude. It led to some bitter years in high school, but I’m over it now. I would have to say that when I wrote this I stopped being self conscious because I just stopped caring what anyone had to say. I had great friends, don’t get me wrong, but there were a lot of times I felt awkward or embarrassed expressing my interests that weren’t ‘cool’. Screw that, I say, because I feel pretty cool nowadays.

However, while I was over this, I felt that there was still more that I could grab on to. I didn’t feel completely myself. I wrote this poem trying to say something, like “I’ve come this far already, but in a year I will be [this]….In five years I will be [that]”. The last four lines of this poem was really something I strove for, for probably the rest of my secondary education. The last couple years, though, I feel like I’ve found that place where I am comfortable being me and I’ve really accomplished what I wanted for myself in those last four lines.

So, this is a poem that really means a lot to me, and I can tell you that if you can actually accept yourself it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. I’m happy being me and anyone else who wants to make a joke, or try and bring me down, I am truly thankful that I can put a smile on their faces because their lives must really suck if they get a kick from putting down others.

That’s all I’ve got to rant about. It’s time to watch some movies.

I Will Be

Someday I’ll be relieved

Free from commitment

I’ll find harmony

On my way to fulfillment

I’ll step outside my shell

Get rid of the guise

Acceptance for myself

No more of these lies

I’ll learn to be free

Find purpose along the way

Finally living as me

Throw these facades away

I’ll be enlightened

Find security

In friends who are friends

Strictly for me

I’ll know truth

Find my place

I’ll learn to let go

And to embrace

I’ll lose my fear

And stop being nervous

Evolve from here

I’ll become outrageous

Won’t care what they say

About my writings and such

Should have been living this way

I’ve wasted so much

I’ll learn optimism

Have hope for myself

Knock down this prison

Because it doesn’t help

I’ll know fate

And all it will let me see

Abolish my hate

Embrace my destiny

I’ll stop trying to be

Someone I am not

Then I won’t have to worry

About getting lost

Someday I’ll be released

Imagination unsealed

No longer incomplete

I will be healed

Thanks for reading!

Till Next,

-Will

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Categories: Growing Up, Life, Poetry, Writing | 2 Comments

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2 thoughts on “I Will Be (A Poem)

  1. torontonanny

    Thank you for the link! Your poem is lovely and the messages are powerful.

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